Everything you've heard about this movie is true. It's bad. The writing is super-cheesy, the action scenes unbelievable and the overall plot is pretty damn hokey.

But it was awesome! ESPLOSIONS! Cool toys! Funny, pointless dialogue! Sword fights! Seriously, if you watched this show as a kid, or just thuroughly enjoyed the PSAs they used to do, you should see this movie. It's superfun. So now you know -- and knowing is half the battle :-)

...but not Star Trek.

I have just returned from the new Star Trek movie and I need to take a moment to rant. Feel free to ignore this one if you don't really care about what Star Trek is and are completely happy with this movie. I won't hold it against you... probably.

For the uninitiated, perhaps this movie was as frickin' awesome as everyone has told me repeatedly. It does, after all carry a strong cast, some decent writing and some pretty damned impressive special effects. This alone would make it an exciting movie, something to entertain and keep you excited for the duration but that alone isn't enough to call it Star Trek. This latest incarnation of the franchise is nothing more than yet another summer blockbuster -- like Terminator, or Wolverine, or Transformers the plot is simple:

• Introduce Good Guys
• Introduce Bad Guys
• Bad Guys are bad
• Good Guys kill bad guys
• Studio makes money

Generally speaking, I like mindless blockbusters. They're fun, and watchable, but Star Trek is better than that. We love the show and even some of the movies because it speaks to us at a higher level, encourages us to question abstracts in our society like morality, justice and peace. It's about exploration and the development of humanity into something Better than we are. It's about more than good guys, bad guys, and cool effects.

This was J.J. Abrams' Star Trek, which is nice for him, and for the hordes of people it will bring to the franchise, but if nothing else, this movie marks the end of Roddenberry's dream... and for someone who grew up on those Ideals, that hurts... a lot.

If only they hadn't dedicated the movie to Gene and Majel...

I've been waiting for this movie for three years.

Paul Gross' new film, "Passchendaele" debuts today and is playing at the Paramount (Scotia) Theatre downtown at 7pm and 10pm. For those interested, Melanie and I will be going down to the 10pm show and you're all welcome to join us.

The National post has a wonderful article explaining the history of the movie and why it's so important that we support it, and for those looking for more detail, the official site has loads of information as well as the trailer.

After Barcamp today, K-dot, Cas, Greg and I went out for food at The Cat's Meow for dinner (absolutely horrible pizza... I mean, their sauce stated like ketchup!). The conversation was good, and I finally got to meet Cas, which was pretty damn cool too. When the fooding was over however (thanks be to Cas and Greg who helped me with my ketchup-pizza), K-dot and Cas offered Greg and I free tickets to see Bill Maher's new flick: Religulous.

After a hurried commute (we had 30min to get from Granville Island to the Granville Cinema... further than it sounds) and a few wrong turns (I'm an idiot) we got there with 5min to spare and practically no seating available. Greg and I caught a pair of seats in the forward left corner and settled down for roughly two hours of hilarious flickage.

The gist of the movie is Maher's going from religious nut to religious nut, asking them rational questions about their irrational faith and then trying to get them to justify themselves. Peppered between funny stuff like comparing Santa Claus to Jesus, and the talking snake to Jack and the Beanstalk, he also interviews some rational believers (can you imagine a Vatican astronomer mocking fundamentalist Evangelicals? It's good stuff.) He then bookended his movie with serious notes about how the people who believe this stuff are the same people with access to very dangerous things and that it's about time that the rational among us stand up to this kind of sanctioned non-thinking, or we risk serious environmental and political repercussions... you know, that "end times" stuff the religious nuts are all excited about.

Great movie. I muchly recommend.

I just saw Hamlet 2 tonight and my review is rather simple:

• It was terrible
• It was also fucking brilliant!

Seriously, I laughed so hard at the pure absurdity of it all and that's what makes this movie genius. Of course I've always had a soft spot for teach movies, so consider the source ^_^

In the space of two hours today I've received two messages from two different people on the same subject:

My coworker has good deal for movie tix. she can get them for $6.95/person. Expires in 2010. If you want, let me know how many asap.

Upon hearing the question the first time around, I was interested, but now... now I smell a rat. Could it be that the Cineplex folks are looking to do any or all of these?

• Lock out any competitors with cheap pre-paid tickets
• Lower the price to cut competition while simultaneously securing clientele

I'm sure that there are more things they could be doing behind the curtain but at this point I'm highly suspicious. They do, after all have a well-earned reputation for monopoly maintenance and exploitation. Has anyone else heard of this?

Alright, so I've been hitting the movie theatre an awful lot lately. Can you blame me with all these great flicks playing and Triple O's "Dinner & a Movie" deal for $13? I can't help myself.

Forbidden Kingdom

When I saw the poster, I was a bit confused as to how Jet Li and Jackie Chan could be in the same movie. I mean, Li is a terrible actor who tends to do action flicks and Chan mostly does comedy. But 20min in I realised the brilliance of this one. To use a term Melanie would understand, this movie is awesome in it's badness. They made no attempt at a serious movie and instead went all out with some fun fantasy kung-fu, magic and drunken humour. Chan is excellent in this one -- if you have the time, I muchly recommend.

Iron Man

After Xmen 3, Spiderman 3 and Ghostrider, I walked into this one with few expectations. I mean, I didn't know much about Iron man, except that Tony Stark was a dick and that RDJ would be perfect for the role. When I walked out of there though, I was totally stoked on Iron Man. Really. Awesome. Flick. Great even if you don't dig comic books, though it'd help. And stick around post-credits!

Speed Racer

The trailers looked cheesy, but with the Wachowski Brothers running the show, I wasn't about to miss it. Poesy and I saw it tonight and damn that was one impressive flick. It's a fine example of movies-as-art, in the same way as Sin City was brilliant, Speed Racer puts a Dick Tracy-esque spin on it all: bright, vibrant colours, cheesy dialogue and fucking awesome oneliners. And there's a monkey! And ninjas! Better than Iron Man. Don't miss this one.

I saw Paprika last night and was very impressed. For those who know something about anime, you know that it's rare to see it in a mainstream theatre like The Paramount, and it's even more rare to see it with subtitles. I had the pleasure of both last night and absolutely LOVED it.

Watch the trailer, and you'll start to understand, but if you really want the full experience, you have to see it on the big screen. Positively lovely.

If you want to see it for yourself, hurry! It's only got one night left at the Paramount.

Pirates of the Caribbean 3 was unbelievably bad. It should be noted here that by "bad" I mean really, really bad. Not quite Eyes Wide Shut bad, but very much three hours of badness I want back from my life.

You'd think that with the millions of dollars they spent on this flick, that they could have sprung for a writer. The guy who thought that it'd be cool to have Jack talking to little dancing clones of himself should get punched in the teeth. The only thing worse than the overall plot, was the back-assward ending. Seriously, for your own sake, stay away.

Seriously, don't waste your time. In roughly two and a half hours of movie, there were only about 30minutes of entertaining footage plus a great stint with Bruce Cambell as a French waiter. Outside of that, it was (sadly, not surprisingly) very disappointing.